When I wrote my post today I knew what I was in for. I knew I was opening a can of worms. I also knew that I was staying true to myself and just saying how I feel and something I was dealing with. I wasn't saying I was right. I wasn't saying I was wrong, I was just saying how I felt. I expected a comment or two letting me know that perhaps I wasn't being sensitive to those that felt serious remorse and were mourning the loss. What I didn't expect was an attack.
Funny thing is, I should have. I should have not only expected it...I should have known from the start that it would be anonymous. People love to use anonymity to hide behind hurtful comments. Perhaps it helps them sleep better at night. Perhaps it gives them a clean slate with to start the next day of finding someone else to bring down.
Here's the thing. In situations like this I try to take the high road. I try to be the person that lets things roll off my back like water. I try to not say that mean things I'd love to say. Thing is, today, I don't feel like being that person.
So, anonymous, when we started our commenting banter I was never mean. I was never as you put it "not handling the situation with grace." I never called you out and said you were wrong. All I did was ask you to quit hiding behind your anonymity. Perhaps that wasn't graceful because I was supposed to just sit back and take what you had to say?
Then you categorized me in your first comment with my adorable healthy baby boy and my loving supportive husband...which trust me I am VERY GRATEFUL for. Thing is, I have bad days and last time I checked this is my blog, the place which I deserve the right to vent. Then you made the claim that you know me, in fact you "know me well enough darling." Darling? Only my Mother and Grandmother have the right to call me "darling." Funny thing is, you never really wanted to come out and say how you knew me. Are we friends? Have we met in person? Have we spent time with each other on a one on one face to face basis? If we haven't then trust me, you do not know me well enough. For that matter, if we have and this is the way you come back at me when I'm in the dumps then you definitely are not a close friend of mine.
Oh and then "I flatter myself to think that my blog is interesting enough for total strangers to read and comment on." What friend even says that? I've never claimed to be interesting. In fact, I'm surprised that anyone other than me reads this. Thing is, I know they do. I don't know why they keep coming back, but they are there. Either way I write for myself, I don't write for anyone else. If you like it, read it. If you don't, then leave. I don't even care if you criticize. Everyone has their opinion and I know for certain that I'm always getting things wrong and putting my foot in my mouth. Where we are different though is when I have something to say, I say with my face, with my name, with myself. I don't hide behind anything.
Finally, "better to be pissed at some random anonymous person than a friend, don't you think?" Hell no. Thing is...I never was pissed. Again, everyone deserves the right to their opinion. When I think back on debate classes from high school and college I don't recall that we did those debates with bags over our heads and I also don't remember going to blows with the people after. I think the whole point of those classes was to learn that we all have our own opinions and are not always going to see eye to eye.
What it comes down to is simple, you weren't here to debate. You were here to make snide hurtful comments and be mean. Maybe that's what you need to make you feel better with whatever is going on in your life. Ironically, this whole experience has made me feel better because no matter how bad it is for me I'm never waking up in the morning on a mission to bring someone else down.
So, anonymous, if we are friends then you can go ahead and "unfriend" me because I can tell you already...I'm not going to miss you when you go. Oh and go ahead and take your XO with you on your way out.