Thursday, February 19, 2009

Sorry, but you suck.

Dear Automatic Sink Faucet,

I'm very sorry, but you suck. You just showed up here at my office, trying to razzle me and dazzle me with your automatic water and your automatic soap. All you have really done is left me with soapy hands and no water to rinse with. I know you are trying to be modern and with the times. I can appreciate that. I'm about modern technology. I'd sell a kidney for a Kindle but you my friend are not worth a clipped toe nail. Oh, and don't even try to tell me that there are three of you in there. I've sink hopped, spreading my dripping soap hands all over the counter only to have NONE of you turn on. When it comes to washing hands, I'm an old fashioned girl and like to turn the water on by a handle. When you leave....can you take all the auto hand blow dryers with you?

Stranded with soapy hands,



Sarah said...

I have to say that I prefer everything in a bathroom to be as touchless as possible. There are a plethora of nasty ass germs everywhere, but MORE in a bathroom. So I'm cool with the touchless faucets, touchless soap etc. But let's face it, they need to work!!!

Usually the do though....sounds like yours are faulty. File a complaint!! =)

Lauren said...

Ha--so true, Stacey! Why is it that automatic faucets never turn on when you want but automatic toilets flush when you're not even ready?! My daughter will have to join a support group pretty soon, she's so afraid of them!

Carol Browne said...

I'm with you in the hand blowers department. Get those OUT! I hate them.

Well Read Hostess said...

I love this.

I'm convinced that the automatic soap dispenser at work thinks I'm a corpse or a vampire. It absolutely refuses to give me soap.

Either that or it thinks I'm a non-soap worthy bitch.

Am I over-thinking this?

Sprout said...

I'm with you sister! We have these at work and I always feel like an idiot waving my hands frantically back and forth trying to coax the water out. Ughhhhhhh!


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